Preston charity and not for profit fostering agency Caritas Care is appealing for more people to come forward to foster, as two of the charity’s carers. Sue and Carolyn share their powerful story of supporting each other and a young person through a family-focused fostering approach that has transformed all their lives.

Sue and her husband, Steve, became foster carers after Steve suffered a stroke that meant both had to leave their long-term careers. Fostering had always been a dream for Sue.

“It was something I’d always wanted to do,” Sue said. “Steve thought they wouldn’t take him because of the disability, but I said, ‘There’s no harm trying.’ And I was right, they did take us!.”

After nearly a decade fostering elsewhere, the couple realised during COVID that they needed a different kind of support.

“It was time for a change,” Sue explained. “So we had a look around at what was on offer, and Caritas Care stood out to us. Because it was a small charity, we instantly felt seen, known, and valued.”

Carolyn, who provides sleepovers care for Sue’s long-term young person “Elsie” (name changed), came to fostering after many years in childcare and caring for her father.

“I come from a big Irish family and there were always children around,” she said. “I thought maybe I could do a bit more for one or two. My husband said, ‘There’s a fostering agency down the road,’ and that was Caritas Care. I didn’t look anywhere else.”

Carolyn now offers regular sleepovers to Elsie and what began as a service quickly became a family-style bond.

“We just say she’s staying with friends,” Carolyn smiled. “I’m like the foster auntie… or grandma… or ‘Fiona’ and my husband Keith is often known as ‘Shrek’ depending on the day!”

Sue added: “Elsie is completely part of our family. But we need sleepovers and Caritas Care made sure we had support that felt right for her. She doesn’t take all her things anymore. She knows there’s a towel there, a lamp there and that she belongs.”

“It’s a family,” Sue said. “We see each other at activities, we can call on each other and the children have that sense of belonging. They have their birth family, their foster family, and their Caritas Care family.”

Both foster carers say Caritas Care’s close-knit approach is what makes fostering successful.

“At Caritas Care, if my social worker isn’t there, anyone can help because they all know us,” Sue said. “We’re valued. That’s important.”

Carolyn added: “I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people. With Caritas Care, it’s a family. You’re never on your own.”

“It just works,” Carolyn said.

“We’re making it as normal a family as possible for her,” Sue added. “It’s not about being a foster carer. It’s about providing a family.”

Caritas Care is urging more people to consider fostering or offering sleepovers, especially as demand continues to rise.

“Don’t rule yourself out,” Sue said. “People think they’re not good enough or can’t do it, but we’ve all got it in us somewhere.”

Carolyns agrees: “Just give it a go. You’ll never know unless you try.”

Sue added:  “Neurodiverse people rule themselves out. Older people rule themselves out. People with disabilities rule themselves out. But honestly, what is ‘normal’? If it feels right for your family, just start the process and see where it takes you.”

Lucy Doughty, Fostering Service Manager said, “The relationship that has developed between the families is just a really special bond, and it’s great that Elsie feels like it’s home from home. It really shows just how important it is to build a supportive community around children and young people and how fostering can change the lives of all involved. We are so thankful to have foster carers like Sue and Carolyn as part of our fostering family.”

If you are considering fostering, you can find out more on Caritas Care’s website https://www.caritascare.org.uk/fostering-agency-lancashire/